Reality

This quote has been my life for the last 7 months...

I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much. -Mother Teresa

It hasn't been easy. We are still having a lot of behavior issues with the girls. Some of the issues are the same since we brought them home and some are new. Truthfully I thought things would be a lot easier by now. It is so hard to know what to do at times and how to effectively parent an adopted children. I read the books and do the things that I think will work, because I want to be the best mom that I can be. But it isn't always that easy, there are days it all gets thrown back in my face and I feel I am back at Hannah's Hope, 7 months ago, picking up these two little girls that are complete strangers to me.

My friend send me THIS BLOG POST (a must read) and it was my wake up call and then...

last night it hit me and hit me hard...

The girls will often talk about their birth father and we are still in the midst of figuring out all the other people that they talk about. Last night Hannah and I were talking and she was telling me about her birth father's house and who all lived here. Then she turned to me and said, "Mommy, I no like your house. I like (birth father's) house."

A SLAP IN THE FACE...

but not a slap in the face of how dare she do that...

A SLAP IN THE FACE...

As in, who am I to think that 7 months is all it will take to make these girls realize we are their forever family.

Who am I to think that just because I show them love that they are naturally going to trust me.

It is going to take A LOT more than 7 months to heal their broken hearts.

They will be 3 next week, so in reality they haven't been with us long. Life in Ethiopia is ingrained in them. And that is mostly a good thing. I want them to remember the details and I love hearing their stories, but I pray that some day the memory of the hardships in Ethiopia will be gone. I am sure that is naive thinking, but as a mom I couldn't pray anything different.

I really needed that slap in the face. Thank you, Hannah.